Exciting Things That Happened In Between the Last Report And Now
The universe was completely destroyed in an apocalyptic "Big Crunch", as the forward momentum generated by the Big Bang was finally stopped by the combined gravity of the universe, then began rushing in again until all of the matter in the universe, converted into energy, collapsed into a single, subatomic pinpoint, before exploding out again in an unimaginably huge Big Bang. You probably missed it, though, probably happened while you were asleep.
Back to EPCOT
Today is Katie's birthday, and she wanted to do the Epcot Food & Wine Festival, so we did. First we went and fastpassed Soarin', determined that we're finally going to do this ride. Then it was festival time as we wandered around the Epcot World Showcase, where each participating country had a stand. Here's the report, where I have color-coded the name of each country to approximate the country's flag, which you'd better enjoy because it took a while!
GREECE
CANADA
IRELAND
FRANCE
BELGIUM
PORTUGAL
MOROCCO
NEW ZEALAND
JAPAN
SINGAPORE
ITALY
POLAND
GERMANY
Break time!
SOUTH AFRICA
SOUTH KOREA
CHINA
We ate: Greek Salad (Balsamic dressing, Feta cheese, olives, tomato, onion) with pita wedge.
Verdict: This is a good appetizer, but I'm not sure it's really different from any other salad. I didn't even notice the feta, which I guess is a good sign.
Katie's verdict: Good, but a lot like stuff we've already had.
Verdict: This is a good appetizer, but I'm not sure it's really different from any other salad. I didn't even notice the feta, which I guess is a good sign.
Katie's verdict: Good, but a lot like stuff we've already had.
CANADA
We had: Chicken Chipotle Sausage with Sweet Corn Polenta & Apple Ice Wine
Verdict: I'm not much of a sausage man, but this was pretty good. Went very well with the wine, which was otherwise a little strong (alcohol-tasting) for me. The polenta was delicious - tastes like it's got some maple syrup in there. I could eat it all day.
Katie's verdict: Yum! I'm not a huge sausage fan either but I liked it. The polenta was the best and I enjoyed the wine but it's hard for me to ever drink more than a few sips.
Break time!Verdict: I'm not much of a sausage man, but this was pretty good. Went very well with the wine, which was otherwise a little strong (alcohol-tasting) for me. The polenta was delicious - tastes like it's got some maple syrup in there. I could eat it all day.
Katie's verdict: Yum! I'm not a huge sausage fan either but I liked it. The polenta was the best and I enjoyed the wine but it's hard for me to ever drink more than a few sips.
Now we went on a movie, "O Canada!" in, well, guess which country. This is one of those movies where there are eight screens in a octagon, and you stand in the middle. Martin Short hosts, and it's actually pretty funny - it starts with an omnipresent narrator declaring that every Canadian lives in an igloo, because it snows in Canada 24 hours a day, which, come on, we all know is true. Then Martin Short comes in and takes over, and you get some nice sweeping shots of the nature and cities of Canada. I just wish we could have sit down, because this hurt my feet. Also, the movie ends with a song by the winner of Canadian Idol 2006, which is even worse than it sounds, if you can believe such a thing.
Now more food!
Now more food!
We had: Kerrygold Cheese Selection (Aged-Irish Cheddar, Dubliner and Ivernia Cheese) with Apple Chutney and Brown Bread; Warm Chocolate Lava Cake with Baileys Ganache; Guinness Draught; Bunratty Meade Honey Wine
Verdict: The Guinness is the best beer I've ever had, not that that's saying much. The meade is very honey flavored, almost too sweet. The volcano cake is delicious - is this really Irish?? The bread was normal brown bread, but the sweet Irish butter that it came with was very tasty and went with it well.
Katie's verdict: Cheese was good, but tasted just like cheddar. I don't like beer but still the Guinness was good. Meade is strong!
Verdict: The Guinness is the best beer I've ever had, not that that's saying much. The meade is very honey flavored, almost too sweet. The volcano cake is delicious - is this really Irish?? The bread was normal brown bread, but the sweet Irish butter that it came with was very tasty and went with it well.
Katie's verdict: Cheese was good, but tasted just like cheddar. I don't like beer but still the Guinness was good. Meade is strong!
FRANCE
We had: Coq au Vin sur Gratin de Macaroni (red wine braised chicken, mushrooms, pearl onions and macaroni gratin); Creme Brulee au Chocolat au Lait (Chocolate milk creme brulee topped with caramalized sugar); Parisian Cosmo Slush (Ciroc vodka, Grand Marnier, and cranberry juice)
Verdict: The red cosmo looks good, but it's just too bitter and cranberry for me. Creme brulee is creme brulee - absolutely delicious, even in a tinfoil and paper container from a booth on the street. Chicken was OK; Not really my speed, but it seemed well-cooked.
Katie's verdict: Snooty Frenchies ran the stand. Liked everything.
Verdict: The red cosmo looks good, but it's just too bitter and cranberry for me. Creme brulee is creme brulee - absolutely delicious, even in a tinfoil and paper container from a booth on the street. Chicken was OK; Not really my speed, but it seemed well-cooked.
Katie's verdict: Snooty Frenchies ran the stand. Liked everything.
BELGIUM
We had: Belgian Waffle with Berry Compote and Whipped Cream
Verdict: Man, this was good. Deliciously light and tasty. We just about inhaled this waffle.
Katie's verdict: Is it bad we just got the waffle? Yummy with the fruit compote.
Verdict: Man, this was good. Deliciously light and tasty. We just about inhaled this waffle.
Katie's verdict: Is it bad we just got the waffle? Yummy with the fruit compote.
PORTUGAL
We had: Linguica Sausage with Onions, Peppers, and Olives & Pastel de Nata
Verdict: The chicken sausage was OK; The peppers & onions were good. Real star here is the desert, a miniature pie that is delightfully light and flaky and filled with delicious warm custard.
Katie's verdict: Sausage and veg were OK, but nothing special. Desert was the best part.
Verdict: The chicken sausage was OK; The peppers & onions were good. Real star here is the desert, a miniature pie that is delightfully light and flaky and filled with delicious warm custard.
Katie's verdict: Sausage and veg were OK, but nothing special. Desert was the best part.
MOROCCO
We had: Kefta Pocket (ground seasoned beef in pita bread), Harissa Chicken Roll, and Baklava
Verdict: The Kefta Pocket is basically a spicy hamburger in a pita pocket. It's pretty good - I could see having one of these as a nice snack. The Harissa is basically like a narrow egg roll filled with spicy chicken and vegetables; It's very tasty and we ate the whole thing. Baklava is a honey and nut cake made out of flaky pastry that was excellent. Nothing bad I can say about the whole menu!
Katie's verdict: Beef was good, like a spicy hamburger. Chicken roll was very good. Baklava was awesome.
Verdict: The Kefta Pocket is basically a spicy hamburger in a pita pocket. It's pretty good - I could see having one of these as a nice snack. The Harissa is basically like a narrow egg roll filled with spicy chicken and vegetables; It's very tasty and we ate the whole thing. Baklava is a honey and nut cake made out of flaky pastry that was excellent. Nothing bad I can say about the whole menu!
Katie's verdict: Beef was good, like a spicy hamburger. Chicken roll was very good. Baklava was awesome.
Break time!
Next we went on THE AMERICAN ADVENTURE, a combination movie/anamatronic show exploring America. This is at the America section of the World Showcase. It's hosted by Ben "I love boobs" Franklin and Mark "Always depicted smoking a cigar" Twain. I have to give this show a lot of credit - it would be easy and knee-jerk to just make the show about how Americans cut a great nation out of the wilderness using nothing but manly beards and not taking showers, but they have Frederick Douglass and Chief Joesph stop by to remind people who did much of the work building America and who we took the land from, respectively. The only downside is that the closing song, about how America needs to spread its golden wings, is incredibly cheesy and catchy and I need to stop thinking about it right now before I start humming it again.
Now back to the food!
Now back to the food!
NEW ZEALAND
We had: Lamb Slider with Tomato Chutney
Verdict: This tasted just like a meatball marinara sandwhich! Kind of messy, though (the lamb piece didn't quite fit the bun).
Katie's verdict: Lamb was yummy.
Verdict: This tasted just like a meatball marinara sandwhich! Kind of messy, though (the lamb piece didn't quite fit the bun).
Katie's verdict: Lamb was yummy.
JAPAN
We had: Spicy Tuna Roll & California Sushi Roll
Verdict: I couldn't taste anything but seaweed in either one of these, sorry. Um, the ginger on the side was good.
Katie's verdict: Still don't like raw fish. I liked the ginger
Verdict: I couldn't taste anything but seaweed in either one of these, sorry. Um, the ginger on the side was good.
Katie's verdict: Still don't like raw fish. I liked the ginger
SINGAPORE
We had: Beef Rendang (Coconut brasied beef) w/ Jasmine Rice
Verdict: Good, but a little spicy for me. Sauce tastes like curry. Probably a side dish, I don't know how much I could eat, even with the rice, before the spice just gets too hot.
Katie's verdict: I agree. Too spicy for a main dish.
Verdict: Good, but a little spicy for me. Sauce tastes like curry. Probably a side dish, I don't know how much I could eat, even with the rice, before the spice just gets too hot.
Katie's verdict: I agree. Too spicy for a main dish.
ITALY
We had: Ravioli di formaggio all'Emiliana (baked cheese ravioli with creamy beef bolongnese, parmesan, and mozarella) and canoli
Verdict: Totally inedible. Looks and tastes like Chef Boyaredee left in the microwave too long. Blech!
Katie's verdict: Not what I was hoping for from a country that practically is food.
Verdict: Totally inedible. Looks and tastes like Chef Boyaredee left in the microwave too long. Blech!
Katie's verdict: Not what I was hoping for from a country that practically is food.
POLAND
We had: Kielbasa and Potato Pierogie with Caramelized Onions and Sour Cream
Verdict: Kielbasa is nasty and chewy - yuck. Perogi was OK. Best part was the caramelized onions, which were nice.
Katie's verdict: I feel like I cheated cause I already liked perogis.
Verdict: Kielbasa is nasty and chewy - yuck. Perogi was OK. Best part was the caramelized onions, which were nice.
Katie's verdict: I feel like I cheated cause I already liked perogis.
GERMANY
We had: Apple Strudel featuring Werther's Original Karamel and Vanilla Sauce
Verdict: Absolutely delicious, although kind of hard to eat - Katie and I had to put a fork in each end and pull to break the strudel up. We almost got the goulash soup, but it was a little hot out for that.
Katie's verdict: Very good.
Verdict: Absolutely delicious, although kind of hard to eat - Katie and I had to put a fork in each end and pull to break the strudel up. We almost got the goulash soup, but it was a little hot out for that.
Katie's verdict: Very good.
Break time!
Time for the Maelstrom - in Norvay!!!! This is a boat ride where Odin welcomes you to Norway, and you see the traditional Vikings, up though today, where they have, um, oil rigs. This is cheesy fun, and the way everyone keeps growling NORVAY!!!! never gets old. I feel bad that nobody - us included - sticks around for the five-minute film on NORVAY!!!! you have to exit through, but I think we made up for it by checking out an exhibit about the Vikings that showed you what a typical warrior would look like, what Olaf II looked like, etc.
Now back to the food!
Now back to the food!
SOUTH AFRICA
We had: Bunny Chow (Vegetable curry served in a bread loaf)
Verdict: I really liked the presentation on this dish - the vegetable curry is served inside a bread bowl you can eat. (It's probably easier if you eat it with a knife to cut the bread bowl, which we didn't think to grab.) The curry isn't bad, but all I could taste was, umm, curry.
Katie's verdict: I would order this, but not as a huge bowl. The small cup of bread we got was the perfect side.
Verdict: I really liked the presentation on this dish - the vegetable curry is served inside a bread bowl you can eat. (It's probably easier if you eat it with a knife to cut the bread bowl, which we didn't think to grab.) The curry isn't bad, but all I could taste was, umm, curry.
Katie's verdict: I would order this, but not as a huge bowl. The small cup of bread we got was the perfect side.
SOUTH KOREA
We had: Boolgogi BBQ Beef with Steamed Rice and Kimchi
Verdict: Kimchee is nasty. Probably the worst thing we had all day - yuck. The beef was excellent, however, and I'm normally not a beef man. BBQ sauce is tasty.
Katie's verdict: Kimchee is gross. I'm surprised that I liked the beef as much as I did.
Verdict: Kimchee is nasty. Probably the worst thing we had all day - yuck. The beef was excellent, however, and I'm normally not a beef man. BBQ sauce is tasty.
Katie's verdict: Kimchee is gross. I'm surprised that I liked the beef as much as I did.
CHINA
We had: Caramel Ginger Ice Cream
Verdict: Delicious! Ginger ice cream sounds like it could be nasty, but it's a wonderful combination of flavors. We at the whole thing!
Katie's verdict: Bonus points for the ice cream being frozen when we got it. I'm going to be sad that I'll never be able to eat this again.
And that's it for the food. There were some more booths, but by now our fast pass for Soarin' was done cooking, and if it burned, my pants would be on fire. With not going on Soarin'. Maybe I had too much of that meade. So anyway, despite the fact that this is the third time we've been to Disney together, we'd never made it on Soarin' until now. And was Soarin' worth the wait and all the trouble and excitement?
Let me put it to you like this: Yes.
Totally free suggestion for a motto for Soarin', because I just enjoyed it that much
Soarin': Fucking Awesome
Soarin' is probably the most amazing experience I've had in all three trips here, and that includes the time I got turned into a were-badger. It's hard to describe, but basically, you sit in a big harness that lifts off the ground and you go into a 180 degree curved Imax screen that simulates hang-gliding. And it's awesome. You really feel like you're gliding over California, in the best sense; It's not scary at all, just exhilarating. I can see why people wait 65 minutes to go on this fucker. WOW
Then we went on Living With the Land to calm down, which is a tour showing you the rainforest - yeah, why not - and to me the more interesting part, a huge experimental greenhouse and aquarium. Katie and I were being annoying douchebags elbowing each other and reading each other the signs ("Look - cucumbers!") but we didn't even give a fuck. We might sign up for the - horrible pun alert - Behind the Seeds greenhouse tour one of these days. I'll have a full report.
By now the sun was down, which cooled things down nicely. So went on Mission: Space. This is a space training simulator where Gary Sinise guides you through a simulated mission to Mars. We were paired up in our four-person crew with a British bird and her son, and I diplomatically refrained from using my obnoxious cockney accent (it's about as offensive and accurate as Dick van Dyke going MARRRRRY POPPINNNNSSSSS in, uh, Mary Poppins). The mission was a success, you'll be happy to hear; You basically just need to push two buttons, but it's masked pretty effectively and even after going on this ride like six times, it's still hard not to get nervous when the flight simulator is rotating so you're on your back getting ready to take off looking up the launch rail.
Then we tried to send goofy Postcards from Space where it superimposes our picture into a video feed so it looks like we're calling from space, but you have to email these and it never seems to work. So we got some astronaut ice cream. Booya.
Gosh, then what. By now it was 6:50 and most stuff closes at 7, so we went on the last run of the day on Ellen's World of Energy, a really weird movie/ride where Ellen falls asleep watching Jeopardy and has a nightmare where she's on Jeopardy, except all the questions are about energy, so Bill Nye the Science Guy stops by and teleports her back to 65,000,000 BC to see how oil is made and she almost gets eaten by a snake. Did I mention this ride is weird? Katie swears I've been on this ride before, but I'm 100% sure I'd remember 37 minutes of Ellen and Bill Nye doing educational schtick. It's a cute ride, though, about as meta as you're going to get at Disney.
Finally it was time to go home, so we did Spaceship Earth again - this time we picked to have a house that cleaned up for us automatically, so our clip-art heads could enjoy coffee and give Fonzie-style thumbs up in joy. Then a trip on the monorail and here we are. Now I'm gonna go digest and watch Phineas & Ferb.
Verdict: Delicious! Ginger ice cream sounds like it could be nasty, but it's a wonderful combination of flavors. We at the whole thing!
Katie's verdict: Bonus points for the ice cream being frozen when we got it. I'm going to be sad that I'll never be able to eat this again.
And that's it for the food. There were some more booths, but by now our fast pass for Soarin' was done cooking, and if it burned, my pants would be on fire. With not going on Soarin'. Maybe I had too much of that meade. So anyway, despite the fact that this is the third time we've been to Disney together, we'd never made it on Soarin' until now. And was Soarin' worth the wait and all the trouble and excitement?
Let me put it to you like this: Yes.
Totally free suggestion for a motto for Soarin', because I just enjoyed it that much
Soarin': Fucking Awesome
Soarin' is probably the most amazing experience I've had in all three trips here, and that includes the time I got turned into a were-badger. It's hard to describe, but basically, you sit in a big harness that lifts off the ground and you go into a 180 degree curved Imax screen that simulates hang-gliding. And it's awesome. You really feel like you're gliding over California, in the best sense; It's not scary at all, just exhilarating. I can see why people wait 65 minutes to go on this fucker. WOW
Then we went on Living With the Land to calm down, which is a tour showing you the rainforest - yeah, why not - and to me the more interesting part, a huge experimental greenhouse and aquarium. Katie and I were being annoying douchebags elbowing each other and reading each other the signs ("Look - cucumbers!") but we didn't even give a fuck. We might sign up for the - horrible pun alert - Behind the Seeds greenhouse tour one of these days. I'll have a full report.
By now the sun was down, which cooled things down nicely. So went on Mission: Space. This is a space training simulator where Gary Sinise guides you through a simulated mission to Mars. We were paired up in our four-person crew with a British bird and her son, and I diplomatically refrained from using my obnoxious cockney accent (it's about as offensive and accurate as Dick van Dyke going MARRRRRY POPPINNNNSSSSS in, uh, Mary Poppins). The mission was a success, you'll be happy to hear; You basically just need to push two buttons, but it's masked pretty effectively and even after going on this ride like six times, it's still hard not to get nervous when the flight simulator is rotating so you're on your back getting ready to take off looking up the launch rail.
Then we tried to send goofy Postcards from Space where it superimposes our picture into a video feed so it looks like we're calling from space, but you have to email these and it never seems to work. So we got some astronaut ice cream. Booya.
Gosh, then what. By now it was 6:50 and most stuff closes at 7, so we went on the last run of the day on Ellen's World of Energy, a really weird movie/ride where Ellen falls asleep watching Jeopardy and has a nightmare where she's on Jeopardy, except all the questions are about energy, so Bill Nye the Science Guy stops by and teleports her back to 65,000,000 BC to see how oil is made and she almost gets eaten by a snake. Did I mention this ride is weird? Katie swears I've been on this ride before, but I'm 100% sure I'd remember 37 minutes of Ellen and Bill Nye doing educational schtick. It's a cute ride, though, about as meta as you're going to get at Disney.
Finally it was time to go home, so we did Spaceship Earth again - this time we picked to have a house that cleaned up for us automatically, so our clip-art heads could enjoy coffee and give Fonzie-style thumbs up in joy. Then a trip on the monorail and here we are. Now I'm gonna go digest and watch Phineas & Ferb.
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